So I was snooping in a book store when I uncovered one of those $5 bargains that’s too good to pass by.

It was simply called it! with a sub-head that read “9 Secrets of the Rich and Famous That Will Take You To The Top”.

Native New Yorkers know its author well. For everyone else, Paula Froelich was, until very recently, the number two writer for Page Six (NY Post).

So, given her background, if there is a person on this planet that knows about stardom, it is Paula.

Let’s face it, after grinding out daily gossip columns for almost a decade, fielding dozens of PR rep calls every day, she’s somewhat the expert in the inside machinations of the celebrity world.

Now, according to Paula, celebrities are made not born.

So if you’re planning to be the face of your brand, or chuck in your marketing day job for a spot in the limelight, grab your designer coffee, find a comfy armchair and get yourself settled.

For here are the 9 Rules you’re gonna need to know and follow:

Rule #1. Find whatever it is you are good at and do it.

Rule # 2. Don’t try to fake a talent you really don’t have.

Rule #3. Don’t know what you’re good at? Ask someone to help you figure it out.

Rule #4. Learn to enjoy the spotlight: Be the star of your own stage.

Rule #5. Educate yourself. Knowledge is power.

Rule #6. Formulate a flexible plan of attack, be patient and stick with it.

Rule #7. If you want it enough, you can get it. But don’t sell yourself short.

Rule #8. Never be mean to waiters. What goes around comes around.

Rule #9. People are going to hate you, so have a hide like a Rhino and above all, don’t give them a reason to bring you down. If something in your life threatens to tarnish or even ruin you, don’t be afraid to cut it loose.

Rule #10. (Sure, I can count, but here is an extra freebie on top.) If you aren’t going to do something, stop bitching about wanting to be a star and stay home. It’s like Woody Allen once said. “99% of success is just showing up.”

Of course, there is a bit more to being a celebrity than just these rules. Paula has managed to fill almost 250 pages with stuff on how to be a celebrity. There’s timing (yep, critical), how you look (yep, critical) and getting yourself a publicist (one who relentlessly stalks reporters to get coverage for you) (yep, critical).

It’s all there in black and white. You’d better get a copy if you hanker for stardom.

Now, before I sign off, I’m going to finish off the post with a snippet from keeping the momentum going, the very last chapter in this fun read.

“As tough as it is to break into the big time, whether it’s in television, movies, politics, music or business, it is much more difficult to sustain success and fame over time. It takes good luck, good judgment, and a lot of skill to stay on top, and those who have managed to do it know that the hard work really begins after you’ve made it.

So what can you learn from the masters? Now that you’ve gotten your name into print, gotten your new venture up and running, gotten your first acting tole, cut your first record, gotten yourself onto that charity committee you’ve been angling for, how do you make sure you don’t totally screw it up?”

1. Don’t take anything for granted. The reason Tom Hanks gets good press is because he is gracious, hardworking, professional and is courteous and responsive.

2. Cultivate grace under pressure. Take the high road whenever possible, to surprise your detractors not with your anger, but with your ability to rise above the fray.

3. Use the power of reinvention. Reinvent yourself to keep your image fresh. Madonna does it, Demi Moore does it, even Bob Dylan does it.

4. Keep proving how good you are at what you do – and keep your integrity. People admire people that come across as direct, honest and display humility.

5. When all else fails, get yourself a reality show. It worked for Donald Trump.

6. Patience is a virtue. You’ll need to put in long, hard hours, weather storms, have good and bad days, and be in or out of favor.

So to make your dreams come true, head off to your book store. You might find Paula there. Or you might find something else.

You just never know what dreams might be fulfilled for under five bucks.

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